Wednesday, December 9, 2009

How To Grow Up

Well let me just begin this new era of "growing up" by welcoming all you Idiots out there, whether if you're a miraculous 3 year old who blogs, a depressed 18 year old who's just been dumped or a 78 year old who finds typing "apple" on the keyboard an epic adventure. Yes. You are all idiots and so am I. If you're offended by the term 'idiot', then you may exit this blog now. You may find it ironic but I indeed am a friendly person. You will see as you get to hear more and more of what I am about to say. And bear in mind that I am your friend no matter who you are. The name calling is nothing more than to break the thick barrier that separates all of us at every moment of our lives; anonymity and our differences in age, class, race, sex, religious believes and personal interest (we are one way or another idiots).

I am simply giving away my believe of the non-idiotic way of living life through a fictional non-idiot character, James Switzer (Someone everyone should try and be). I simply speak the truth I believe in. Again, listening to me is entirely up to you.

The first article revolves around patronization of the age difference among society.

Article 1: Age is NOT just a number

Mom: "Jimmy! How many times do I have to tell you not to jump on my couch!? You're damaging the material! They're very expensive"

Jimmy replies: Mom! How many times do I have to tell you not to smoke in the house?! You're damaging my lungs. They're priceless."




....and there you have it. Difference in the perspectives of life and YES, age makes a difference. Jimmy's mom is (according to her) all grown up. But frankly, she is one of those whom I call a victim of the society. She has lived too long in this world and has been brainwashed for 39 years of her life to perceive career success and material wealth as a mark of being a successful grown up. In a much more familiar and simple term, she's a devoted idiot of the American dream. Now, I am not saying following a dream is wrong (Hell I wish I was the richest person in the world! ). I am merely talking about the idiot in her, just like in all of us which blinds us to see a wider perspective of life. A perspective that can change us all. A perspective that actually brings happiness.

Jimmy on the other hand, is young and yet to discover the colossal brainwash works that awaits him in the future. He's still lacking the social experience (brainwashing) and is in a sane state of mind to remind his mom that there is no way she was allowed to FedEx her favorite couch through the Gates of Heaven no matter how many credit cards she has (There are no evidence up to date that heaven or hell accepted FedEx deliveries ).


Well said Jimmy! Your words of wisdom will change the world. James Switzer aka Jimmy, is 5 years old in this article and a fictional character. He is so because James is the ideal human being who is NOT an idiot like the rest of us. Jimmy will walk us through his non-idiotic life to guide us the right way. The way to open up the broader perspective. A way to GROW UP in all aspects that will bring out the realization in us about happiness and how it has been at our doorstep all this while.


We speak of age without exactly knowing what it is.
We are supposed to act upon our "age". What does that mean?

"Don't talk about sex here! There are children around!"

How many times have we said or thought or heard a sentence similar to this?

On a much more personal touch, I once met a 7 year old kid who goes on and on about the process on how female condoms are manufactured and details of its function with such complexity. So detailed that I tried to close his mouth with my bare hands to shut him up (it was at a HIV campaign awareness program). What on earth was the kid doing there??
And then came his father, who is a condom quality control chief for several brands to give his public speech. That explained everything and I felt like the idiot I am for believing that a 7 year old knowing so much was unhealthy.

Dad: "Hey kiddo, Santa isn't gonna get you anything if you don't listen to your mom."


Jimmy: "Its okay. I don't like that man anyway."



Dad: "Why not?"



Jimmy: "Last Christmas, I saw him kissing mommy's wee wee in the bedroom while you we're out."




Freaking out, daddy now has no choice but to explain to 5 year old James that Santa was not for real and it was daddy in a costume. He was also having a hard time trying to explain how is it when two married people loved each other very much, there were different ways of showing it. He also explained to Jimmy that it is not right to speak of these things straight out because it was simply not the right thing to do.

Unlike the 7 year old I met, Jimmy learned about certain truths the hard way. And he also figured that daddy was a big fat liar (So much for the advantage of lying to a kid).


Jimmy: Why do you lie daddy? Is it because i'm small?


Daddy: Oh no sweetie. Daddy is very sorry that he had to lie. From now on I will do my best to explain things with honesty to you. You should know that lying is wrong.


Jimmy: "Yes I know."



This is the first stepping stone for James Switzer to walk his path of a non-idiotic life. By the age of 6, Jimmy learns from his daddy that not all the prince are good looking and not all the princess are beautiful. He then learned that not all evil witches are ugly with a crooked nose. He also learned that snow white was extremely stupid and moronic not to wash the apple before eating it and also, NOT a kiss but proper technique and timing was required to save someone from being choked to death.



Jimmy says that age is NOT just a number. Everytime he grew older, he saw and learned new things. And he was more successful in perceiving the right and wrong when he already knew certain truths when he was younger.

Jimmy wants everyone to not patronize him regarding his age. I do not want to be patronized regarding my age too and your children and parents and friends do not want to be treated the same way. A 16 year old could possibly discover alternative fuels for the future. A 75 year old could do a tango better that a 35. A 6 year old could tell you hurtful truths about the importance in health compared to wealth and be right.

Break the barrier of age as it could work in many opposite ways from our initial beliefs. The older we get, the more we get hooked on to social standards of the majority. We think that smoking is cool but Jimmy knows otherwise. We think that the ugly was not blessed enough by God but 6 year old Jimmy knows otherwise. We think that lying could help us all the time but Jimmy today knows otherwise. He is the non-idiot. Thank you Jimmy.


Abraham Lincoln: And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years.

Article 2 pending...